Kindness matters. I think we all know that fact, but it does not always register in our brains. We go to the store or see a meme online saying “Kindness Matters,” but well, it is way more than just a nice saying. Why does kindness matter? And what does the phrase really mean anyway? Today’s post is a reflection on the role kindness plays in the healing process.
Kindness is generally defined as being kind. So helpful, right? According to the Oxford dictionary from a search on Google, kind means “generous, helpful, and thinking about other’s feelings.” The Merriam Webster dictionary describes kind as “sympathetic or helpful nature.” The Bible also says in Galatians 5:22-23 that the fruit of the Spirit is “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness…” So kindness means that people look out for other’s emotions and internal state. They help others and show generosity. God’s spirit shows us kindness as we heal and find mercy from the cruelty shown to us by others.
So again, why does kindness matter?
In the context of this blog, we are talking about overcoming trauma and abuse which means that those of us who are working through the aftermath need kindness. We need people to treat us right so we can heal, and kindness is an aspect of that healing. We need God to be kind to us, and we need humans to be kind to us. Even animals can show kindness. Dogs are the best at this when they sense we are down and comfort us.
We need humans to show us kindness.
Where others failed, we need others to show us kindness so we can heal, so we can find faith in humanity again, so our spirits will revive, so we can have hope again. Humans have the unique ability to understand another person’s distress, enter it, demonstrate love and kindness, and heal that person. It is much like what God does and allows humans to be the hands and feet of Jesus to others.
We need God to show us kindness
We need God to show us kindness because if no one else does, hope is truly lost,and we need God to be kind to us. Many of you who are wounded received your wounding from other Christians in the church – by those who said they believed in God and then turned their back on you. Their actions can influence you to believe that God turned his back on you too. However, God did not turnefffd his back on you. Beyond the black cloud, God is there. So many times – way too many to count – as I prayed through the sexual abuse, I waited for God to smack me for the thoughts that crossed my mind. But, he did not smack me. He simply let me work through the stuff in my heart until it was all gone and I could see him better.
You see, before Jesus came to earth, the prophet Isaiah said that Jesus would be called the “Wonderful Counselor” in Isaiah 9:6. The context here is the prophet Isaiah telling about Christ coming and what his name will mean. Jesus is the Wonderful Counselor because he is the best counselor one will ever find. His kindness matters because if he isn’t, then there is no mercy or space to consider the issue , work through it, and reach any measure of healing. God’s kindness is required in counseling. So in the context of healing, God understands both are required. And when we approach him for the healing of our souls, his kindness matters. His kindness never ends and it is what we need to truly heal.
Treat us with kindness.
Kindness matters because trauma and abuse often teach us that unkind behavior is acceptable when it is not acceptable. We gravitate repeatedly towards those that treat us unkindly thinking we deserve that treatment. When, we don’t. We do not deserve to be treated that way. So, we need to look for kind people who treat us kindly and accept treating others kindly as their standard. that we need Kindness shows that we have value and demonstrates that value by looking after our needs both internal and external.
In conclusion, kindness matters. You need it, and I need it. We can be a positive influence in someone else’s life when we show them kindness. Kindness matters.
~ Leisel
